She says I need to go on a diet.
That there have been too many treats lately. That I am getting a bit broad in the beam and too heavy to lift into the bath.
Well, all I have to say is that if she is going to dangle cheese and turkey in front of my nose, whose fault is that? And if we are talking ‘broad in the beam’ here, maybe someone should look in the mirror. From behind.
She says it happens when we get older… that bits of us slow down inside and out, so we can’t eat like pups and get away with it like we used to. That we need to get out and exercise more. More walks? Anytime! More tennis balls? I’m down with that!
But no treats? That takes all the fun out of it. And my treats are only bits of chicken… mostly. Apart from the cheese. And maybe the odd sausage or two. And the custard… Hers have had a lot of those calorie things in them lately. I’m not sure what they are but I don’t think I want any…they sound unpleasant and seem to upset her.
It’s the whole ‘we’ business that gets me. She says we are now about the same age, ’cause four-legses age quicker than two-legses. All I have to say, is that I’d like to see her chasing rabbits and pigeons…
As to the whole bath thing, well, if she can’t get me in there… I’m not going to be complaining! I say I just smell as a doglet should. She says something quite different.
There was talk of me having a bath this weekend, ’cause we had company and the ball guy has been an accessory to her criminal attempts to make me smell like a flower before. But one of my boys rescued me by making her spend all morning at the big two-legs vets, getting him fixed. She says he’d had a bit of an accident, but I’d like to think he was protecting me from the flowery stuff. His timing was perfect for a rescue operation though 🙂
Still, there’s one treat she can’t complain about… I got a review of my book! That was a lovely surprise to start the year with! Now she says it is her name on the cover. I say she could never have written it without me and it is my face on the cover, after all.
If you would like to read the review, you need to visit Ritu at But I Smile Anyway. Ritu belongs to Sonu Singh who has obviously done a good job with his two legs… much better than I seem to be managing training mine…
Speaking of which, I think it is about time for her morning run…
Well, she calls it a walk, but we’ll see about that…
Broad in the beam? Hrmph!