Spyder

I just wanted to get a quick shower
But decided ablutions can wait
There’s the spider from hell in my bathtub
He’s the size of a small dinner plate.

He was fine when he lived in the kitchen,
And I coped with him out in the hall…
But the bathroom’s a different matter
I don’t like him in there at all.

I’d hate him to go down the plughole,
For one thing, he’s too fat to fit!
Inadvertently stepping upon him?
I wouldn’t like that, not a bit!

Just supposing he goes for the popcorn
And then leers at me over the tap?
Or he fancies a snack more substantial?
I’d be out of the bath in a snap!

But this morning, he’s once again missing,
Now I worry where he’s gone to hide
As I shake out the folds of the towel
Just in case its in there he resides…

I don’t want to be watched in the shower,
By something with more legs than me…
I’m not sure which is worse to be honest,
A watcher or one I can’t see…

About Sue Vincent

Sue Vincent is a Yorkshire-born writer and one of the Directors of The Silent Eye, a modern Mystery School. She writes alone and with Stuart France, exploring ancient myths, the mysterious landscape of Albion and the inner journey of the soul. Find out more at France and Vincent. She is owned by a small dog who also blogs. Follow her at scvincent.com and on Twitter @SCVincent. Find her books on Goodreads and follow her on Amazon worldwide to find out about new releases and offers. Email: findme@scvincent.com.
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61 Responses to Spyder

  1. Athira says:

    Was it a black spider..its poisonous than others

    Liked by 3 people

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  3. Sadje says:

    Oops! You’re so right, it’s hard to decide we prefer them visible or gone!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. willowdot21 says:

    Ewe! I don’t like spiders one bit. Beautifully written Sue. πŸ’œ

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Darlene says:

    There was one in my bathtub too but not very big. It went down the drain when the water ran. If heΒ΄s the itsy bitsy spider, he will be back.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Love it Sue.. I prefer to see where they are rather than be hidden.. particularly in the shower….xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  7. House spiders are the worst. It’s not their fault, I know, but they are massive compared with the ones that make webs and sit in them, and they run about.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. jenanita01 says:

    This is the time of year for those huge house spiders, I often wonder where they hang out when they’re not patrolling around the house!

    Like

  9. Cathy Cade says:

    I grab my spider-catcher when a spider lurks at home
    I’m not sure it doesn’t harm their little limbs
    But it keeps them safe at arms-length when I trap them in its jaws
    And release them, through the casement, to the wind

    Like

  10. quiall says:

    hahaha. My cats kept my apartment spider free.

    Like

  11. Frank Hubeny says:

    Very well written. I am glad there aren’t any spiders like that around here. At least I haven’t seen any yet.

    Like

  12. Great poem Sue. As you know I hate spiders, and Kizzy would just let them walk all over her. Barney wasn’t too fussed, and neither was Maggie bless her, so Hubby was my spider catcher.
    Have a comfortable day.

    Like

  13. Widdershins says:

    Heh, heh, heh … I figure that if a spider wants to have a shower with me (after several warnings and many attempts at removal, of course) that’s her, or his, lookout … and they deserve everything they see! πŸ˜€

    Like

  14. I usually don’t mind spiders, Sue, but still… having them lurk around unseen is a bit creepy. I hope you got your shower in!

    Like

  15. noelleg44 says:

    I hate spiders, too, but I respect them. I always removed them alive from our pool because they do all sorts of good things. Unfortunately, I was bitten by one that got into our sheets when we moved – had a lovely bulls-eye on my leg – red, green, blue. – the scab from the bite is still there. Itchy!
    You’re wise to avoid them if you can’t remove them!

    Like

  16. Eliza Waters says:

    Haha, such a good one, Sue. I must agree! πŸ™‚

    Like

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