
As soon as certain words connect…
Like shopping’, ‘shoes’ and ‘style’,
I find myself in solitude…
My family run a mile.
They’re used to all the cursing,
As I grumble, spit and moan,
They all abandon ship
And leave me shoe-shopping alone.
I need a pair of simple shoes…
The kind you’d wear for best.
You know, the type of classic style
That outlives all the rest?
I used to wear my heels to work
And walk and drive all day,
Then don an even higher pair
When I went out to play.
But walking dogs through muddy fields
And pushing round a chair,
I’ve ended up in comfort shoes
I barely know are there.
And this is good, for over time
I have abused my feet,
So, with arthritis, cysts and wear
I must admit defeat.
I’ll never wear the heels I loved
To reach the heights they gave,
Though I have never been,
To shoe-addiction, such a slave.
I did like feeling elegant
And ladylike and chic,
Although I never tottered
Round on highest heel-dom’s peak.
I’m happy with a lower heel
With comfort, sense and style,
Without inviting agony
If I should walk a mile.
But can I find a decent pair
That do not hurt my purse?
Or, if the price is sensible,
Won’t make me flinch and curse?
I’ve no desire for bunions,
Nor for blister, cut nor corn,
Just something sleek and simple
That with comfort can be worn.
I don’t want chunky clodhoppers,
Just ’cause I like my feet…
Why can’t a comfy shoe equate
To something small and neat?
I don’t want winklepickers
That will squeeze my toes to hell,
Nor platforms off of which I’ll fall
And break a leg* as well!
I just want something simple,
Something sensible and neat,
To add some femininity
To my poor aching feet.
Nor do I want to work a week
So I can pay the price
Of something that will fall apart
Designed to ‘just look nice’.
“They’re not designed to walk in!”
I’ve been told when I’ve complained
At shoes that fell apart and died
The first time that it rained…
There is another factor though,
That’s not too hard to see…
My feet are still a children’s size,
The problem lies with me.
It’s hard to find a decent style
To match the age I wear…
Perhaps I should give up and keep
My tiny feet all bare.
While other women love their shoes
And shop the latest fashion
Shoe shopping is for me a chore…
I hate it with a passion!
*I was young, it was the 70s, platforms were high…there was a power cut, the streets were dark and I had a date… I spent the evening getting plastered instead. And stayed in plaster for months…
The irony was that I’d just had the plaster removed after breaking an ankle on the safety mat of the trampoline. Then I broke it again…falling of the platform of the No. 77 bus on the way back from having the previous plaster removed…
I’m not at all accident prone…
Image by Hugh Turvey.



























🙂 lol Although my feet have never been what anyone would call tiny, I can definitely relate to every other word! I do own a far too many pairs of great looking heels, however. They look practically brand new — because they’ve barely been worn in all the time I’ve had them!
Don’t get me wrong. From my 20s to early 40s, nobody ever saw me in anything BUT heels. Tall already, I adored being even taller, and I understood what kind of shoes to look for that allowed me to actually walk upright all day (though I can’t exactly say with total comfort). Most had open toed fronts, so no bunions or corns here – but 3″ heels were no strangers to my closet.
Except for my hiking boots and a pair of earth shoes that were popular for barely a blip of duck-footed time, I didn’t even OWN a pair of flats (or flat boots) until I broke a toe and had to buy a few because I simply could not tolerate heels for some time following. The skies parted.
ROUNDED toes – my kingdom for shoes with rounded toes. Ya’ know, the kind where all five little piggies nestle side by side, none crunched together, and nobody’s on top of anybody else? And solid, stable heels. Not ugly, not workman-like — the kind of heels women wore during the 40s, when the men were at war and Rosie and her gang of girls took over in the workplace, when women expected to look feminine in their cherished stockings and heels, but still be able to dance the night away in the darned things.
I came across a brand new pair of 40’s throwbacks in New York City – decades ago now – that I bought initially as a fashion statement. I have had those shoes resoled repeatedly because they were are stylish *and* comfortable. They are still comfortable, but more than a bit worn around the edges, so I can no longer claim that they are exactly stylish any longer. ::sigh::
I’ve looked, but I have never seen a pair like them since. Never, that is, except for the other pair *exactly* like them that I bought at the same time – long since waiting for me to join them in the hi-heeled version of rainbow bridge so that we can walk into heaven together.
Which is WAY too many words simply to say – GREAT post!!! I’m right there with you.
xx,
mgh
(Madelyn Griffith-Haynie – ADDandSoMuchMore dot com)
– ADD Coach Training Field founder; ADD Coaching co-founder –
“It takes a village to educate a world!”
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I love the 40s style shoes ans have ALWAYS gone for open or round toes…never have I squeezed my feet into pointed toes…largely because I fall over the empty bit in the point 🙂 I’ve double-bought cmfy shoes too when I could 🙂
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I decided as a child that I was not going to have crone toes as an old lady. I’m not quite there yet, but so far, so good.
xx,
mgh
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I danced too much to have perfect toes… the damage is done there, but shoes need to be at least partly foot shaped ;)xx
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More and more so as we grow ever older, I fear. I danced too, btw, but jazz or tap vs. much ballet, and much of my dancing was barefoot.
It’s a wonder I didn’t break my toe in a shoe-related incident like yours, since the platforms I preferred were practically stilts. But no – it was the result of losing my balance attempting to exit a slippery bathtub with extremely broad sides during a visit to a friend across the country.
I had nothing in my suitcase that would fit over my poor swollen toes — and was forced to limp through the visit in borrowed sneakers – and the airport and everywhere else until I could find a few pairs of flat shoes with roomy toe boxes in toney Manhattan, my home at the time. Horrors!
Off to bed as soon as I hit send – almost 5AM here.
xx,
mgh
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Mine was mainly ballet… the toes took a hit. 🙂 Sleep well xx
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I am the other end of the spectrum.. size 8 – I have a few pairs left that I will never part with despite the fact I won’t ever wear again.. Sentimental value.. But almost impossible to get comfortable and elegant in my size.. I might as well walk away with the shoe box.
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I have two pairs of heels… one my satin dance shoes and one in lace for ‘occasions’. Not big heels, either of them, but I’ll probably not get the chance to wear them either.
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I think we have stopped dressing up except for weddings.. I used to love glamming up.. but even if you go to a good restaurant it is very casual.. I will my red heels again one day… said Dorothy!!
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Glam tends to be far more about comfort these days. Style shouldn’t have to hurt. But I seldom get beyond just comfort…
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Anymore, I seldom get beyond slipper boots – changing to the outside version only when I walk Tink or run to the store. I mourn the dress-up NYC lifestyle, but comfortable shoes seem to more acceptable in sweatpants towns, so I don’t really complain too much that there is nothing to dress up FOR in every day is casual day Cincinnati, Ohio.
xx,
mgh
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I couldn’t be bothered with the corporate look any more, I believe. Been there, done that every day for too long. xx
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Strict dress code in Manhattan. Violate at your own risk (they lower that glass ceiling and give you the worst tables in restaurants) 🙂
xx,
mgh
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I live in a village…wellies are de rigeur 😉
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I always wanted a pair of wellies – but they don’t seem to sell them in the USA.
xx, mgh
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You can get them on Amazon.com…I just checked 🙂 xxx
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I’ll see if I can squeeze them into my meager budget – Thanks! Although, I’ve always thought shopping online for shoes was risky, since I know I’d probably never get it together to return any that didn’t fit until it was too late to do so. (Said she, after being forced to give away or alter more than a few items.) 🙂
xx, mgh
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I don’t care for shoe-shopping nline either, but wellies should be okay 🙂 xx
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Try 9-1/2! Even the stores that cater to drag queens tend to go up from 10 (yes, I investigated that idea when I lived in Manhattan and located a great one!!). I also investigated the possibility of a custom last at an amazing midtown Manhattan store that catered to executive women who have to be on their feet or out and about all day, so must be comfortable as well as fashionable. At the time, bespoke shoes STARTED at $1,000 a pair – *after* you pay for the last, btw (double that now, I’m sure). Maybe if I won the lottery?
Most department stores jump from 9 to 10, with not a great deal of stock once you pass 8-1/2 in any case, even ones that might as well be orthopedics. Get there early or go without, I guess! And I have *never* been a barefoot princess like Sue – hypersensitive to the feeling of dirt on my feet even now. My getting ratty slipper-boots are my best inside friends now that it is so cold – and I will have to replace those ere long, hopefully before they fall apart (never 9-1/2s in slippers, always stuck with 10’s there).
Your shoe box metaphor was the reason I resisted flats for so long – shoes seem to have a smaller footprint in even big-bruiser heels (especially when worn with the kind of pants when hems past the ankles).
Ah vanity – thy name is woman?
xx,
mgh
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When I lived in the States had no problem getting shoes size 10 which is the UK 8.. It is the UK and Ireland that assume if you have feet that size you are abnormal or need extra wide and support stockings! My husband has the same problem as he needs size 11s and apparently UK men only go up to size 10! And my mother at 95 was still vain and would insist on wearing her heels even if she was sat in her chair most of the day.. the glue that kept her going… xxx
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My grandmother could barely walk as she aged, due to some kind of shortening of the tendons as a result of a lifetime in heels. She was never the type to explore yoga, dance, etc. – so she hobbled and fuffed until she died, after she could barely tolerate heels no longer.
My brain immediately jumps to a million dollar online opportunity here – the Big Feet/Good Feet store “fashion for men, women and children who hope to be able to walk on those feet forever.”
Or am I encroaching on Zappos turf?
xx,
mgh
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Oh Sue! I feel for you! I can’t clear heels anymore… no comfort In them!
It’s Sketchers all the way for me now but I have to budget as they aren’t cheap!!!
When the platform revival was happening in the 90’s… my uni years, I had a pair. Loved them!
One night in a London club, I was walking down some stairs and fell… ending up in the arms of some goofy bloke waiting to catch me… it turned out his mate purposely got his foot stuck in my platform arch to trip me up… engineering the catch!
I skedaddled asap!!! Shoes eh!
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I’m happiest barefoot, I have to say… but I miss heels…just little ones…. I can still walk in tall heels with grace. I just can’t walk at all for the next few days if I wear them 🙂
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I love the barefoot feeling too!
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It just gets a bit chilly this time of year 🙂
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I was given.lovely fluffy slipper boots this Christmas… they are my best friends at the moment!!!
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Wiht he dog, I need something that doesn’t mind wet grass and doesn’t look as if it needs attacking 🙂
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True!!!
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🙂
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But Sonu likes to sit on my slippers which can prove hard when. I want to wear them!
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Ani sits on my feet when I am wearing them… talkk abt a hot dog 🙂
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Lol!!!
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🙂
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Boots – or flip flops 😋
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My toes won’t let me wear flip-flops 😦
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I wear heels to work every day but as I sit on my bottom all day it isn’t really a problem. I feel your pain though. Heaven help me if I actually have to walk in them…
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i can walk in them just fine. It’s the next day, when I can’t walk at all 😉
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Lol – that got my day off to a smiley start, thanks 🙂 Take care of those precious feet! Blessings of comfort AND chic! H xxx
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I’d need a mortgage or some of the shoes I’ve seen that fill both the requirements of comfort and style 🙂 xx
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You’re not kidding – see my long reply to Sally in an earlier comment.
xx,
mgh
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I did 🙂 xx
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I’m a size 2 and know the utter despair of shopping for a pair of shoes that are not covered in bows and look good on a nine year old.
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Oh goodness… it is bad enough in a 4! xx
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Yep – that sounds worse, Adele – but I can’t remember EVER being a size 2. Are you tiny otherwise, or just cursed with dainty tootsies?
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Tiny frame, really small head, legs arms and height, 5ft but unfortunately my tummy makes it all look funny. It’s always been a problem since a kid.
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5ft here too… and surgeries made my tummy weird. That’s my excuse 😉
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I had my gall bladder out and the first surgeon took away my tummy button 😦 got a hernia and the second surgeon tried his best to give me a new one, he was great. lol but yeah I had a c section with my daughter and it’s left my tummy looking a bit weird. x
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Mine had a double scare right across and it…grins at me 🙂 x
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🙂 cool
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My “middle aged creep” went away totally when I gave up gluten, Adele – I’ve heard similar from folks like you as well. It takes a few month, but for me it has been totally worth it for a number of other reasons too. (Not a celiac, btw)
You DO have to cut it out completely to get the benefits, however — simply “cutting back” won’t do it.
I’m not one to jump on fad diet bandwagons, but after I attended a Summit and heard what the front-runner experts in the field had to say about the effects of gluten on the human gut (over 30 years for some), I stopped cold.
xx,
mgh
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Thank you Madelyn, i have a good friend who has celiac and my aunt and cousin have too. Gluten free is hard at first indeed but after reading what you have just said, I think it will be worth it to me. Also have dreadful IBS which I’m sick with a lot. Gluten probably affects that as well. x
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No doubt! It is not really all that difficult a diet after a while – though I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I miss cake, cookies, and really great bread more than once in a while. As I age, keeping my health becomes increasingly important – especially watching what the incumbents [are failing to] plan for the healthcare of America.
Once I understood the science behind the problems with gluten (today’s *especially* – NOT the same stuff our ancestors consumed generations ago), I felt it was something I had to do for myself as a preventative measure. Even though I had no overt symptoms, I wasn’t willing to wait until I did!
Again, however, to make a difference with an existing health problem you must remove it from your diet *totally* — you cannot “cheat.”
If you are like most of us, once you see a positive difference in your health and your body, you will probably attempt to add a little back. Once you see for yourself what attempting does to your health after a bit, that alone will make it easier to choose to remain GF.
Good luck! IBS is reported to respond extremely positively (and “relatively” rapidly, compared to the time it takes for the belly to flatten).
xx,
mgh
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Thank you Madelyn for all your great advice. I’ll let you know how I get on. x
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Reblogged this on Anita Dawes & Jaye Marie.
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In my youth, I hated shoe shops. I have big feet, and assistants would sadly shake their heads and walk away. These days I live in flip flops (crocs) and Sketchers, leaving behind the world of fashion and style. I must be comfortable and steady after all…
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It was always the pursed lips, shaken heads and comments about high insteps…like it was my fault…
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Yes, I remember that, probably the reason I go barefoot most of the time…
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So do I 🙂
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I have big boobs, so I always retort that I need big feet to keep from toppling over.
xx,
mgh
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That may be my problem…small feet 😉
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I don’t have that as an excuse, being six foot tall seems to be the problem…
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That’s a long way to fall…
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Yes, I have found that out a couple of times…
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😦
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Well yeah! I’m surprised anyone ever wonders about the size of the feet of someone that tall – haven’t they ever heard of scale? What IS it about the appeal of tiny feet anyway (foot-binding, etc.) – such an odd human fetish that can’t be evolutionarily adaptive, can it?
xx,
mgh
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Exactly. I have small feet… but then, I’m only five feet tall. xx
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Perfectly proportioned, IMHO. NOW, if we could only get the shoe industry on board.
What do women want? Comfortable shoes that do for feet what great clothing design does for bodies – visually change proportional elements (without the use of boning, corsets, or three inch shoulder pads).
xx,
mgh
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Foot shaped elegance… a pipe dream… xx
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I still don’t think mine are too big, size 8 (UK) but remarks have been made in the past about needing to wear the boxes the shoes come in …
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I think the person who made the remark would have ended up ‘wearing’ them…
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I didn’t realize that feet could continue to grow until mine did. I moved to NYC in my late 20’s as a size 8-1/2 and there is no way I could get that on now. I would literally be better off in the boxes if that were my only choice. 🙂
xx,
mgh
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🙂 xx
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LOL… XX
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In my twenties, I had the figure, the high, high heels, wore them all day at work and at home too. Never had sore feet then. Today I wear a most sensible, comfortable shoe, costing a fortune a pair. That was a great poem Sue.
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I managed the heels nto my fifties… being short, the height was good and I was happy to do pretty much anything in them. Now my toes protest. Thanks, Hélène.
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HaHA! I LOVED this Sue. I can’t wear high heels much either anymore! However, I am rather fond of some of the ‘chunky clodhopper’ type shoes as they take ages to wear down! Great for work 🙂
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I’ll stick with flatties for work, but my favourites are dance shoes that are soled just at heel and toe… so comfortable 🙂
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I already like the sounds of them, 🙂
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They bend and weigh nothing at all 🙂
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Reblogged this on Edwina's Episodes and commented:
A hilarious poem by Sue on her shoe-shopping blues!
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Delightful, Sue. I can empathize with a lot of this. Perhaps your next creative adventure can be to design some sleek, elegant, affordable shoes for all of us? xx
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I can design them with no problem… just whip the suede soles of a pair of ballroom shoes and replace them with something non-slip…and there you have perfection. xx
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This is a really good poem, there is plenty of truth behind it. I wear heels sometimes, but none any higher than two or three inches, there has be research that shows just how bad they are so I try to wear flats as much as I can.
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You only have to look at the x-ray of the foot I used as an illustration to see how much damage is being done… let alone to other parts of the body. Yet some kind of heel is good for posture…so some neat, small ones would do me nicely!
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Your wonderful poetry has touched a ‘sore’ topic for me. I have huge feet (11 1/2) making shoes that fit hard to find. Add to that arthritic feet and buying shoes is something I dread. I too used to wear heels – some really high – now I keep the heel at an inch or inch and a half. I did find some shoes that were made out of a sturdy thick fabric with a little stretch rounded toe end – bought three pairs. I used to lecture my medical students about the necessity of taking care of their feet – since they would be on them daily for a lifetime. MEN make these damn heels for women, so they can admire their legs and buttocks. And look what they wear!
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You have a point there, Noelle, though I quite liked my own legs in heels too 🙂 Stage/ dance shoes are where I’m looking now.
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For a while I wore nursing shoes. Hadn’t thought about dance shoes!
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I really like dance shoes. The spilt sole ones I wear for everyday are exceptionally comfortable. I may have to save up for some ‘character shoes’ for my heels 🙂
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Did you dream that that this would turn out to be your most discussed post when you drafted it? Now do one about the dearth of functional pockets in women’s clothing and you may go viral! 🙂
xx,
mgh
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Bra’s knickers and shoes seem to get the converstaion going. It is an engineering debate, you understand, not a fashion one 😉 xx
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Of course. xx, mgh
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😀 xx
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All good things come to an end. Delightful poem, Sue. What a wedgies?
Heels. I used to love them. The last time I had occasion to put on my best pair was almost three years ago, in China. I saw some people looked surprised, cause they thought I was old.
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Age and heels have no correlation 😉 Apart from arthritic toes… and I’ve had them longer than the wrinkles 😉
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😀 😀 😀
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🙂
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Every woman can certainly relate. Your double break makes me think of a friend who immediately after having an unplanned pregnancy found herself pregnant again. I think hers was also an alcohol related accident 😀
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Double? Three…
And none of them were alcohol related… the only getting plastered was in the ER 🙂
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Oh goodness, did I just have a laugh at my American self! I understood that you got drunk (plastered we would call it) on your date and broke your ankle as a result. Thought you were revealing a bit of your wilder youth 😉 Sorry for my misunderstanding!
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The pun was in there 🙂 We call it plastered too 🙂
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My attention is split between a movie with Johnny, reading, writing, and a foot massage all at this moment. And on my mind, pizza. Obviously more than I can handle all at once 😀
I’ve never heard anyone here in Ireland call it plastered. Always it’s getting ‘pissed’.
Anyway, I really enjoyed this read and definitely see your personal style/voice in your poetry. Enjoy the weekend Sue.
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If you are getting a foot massage… go and concentrate on enjoying that 🙂 Have a lovely Sunday Melissa 🙂
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I wince!
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Just looking at that x=ray is enough to remind me why I don’t wear true high heels 🙂
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We should have it posted in every shoe store -ha! I know now why that particular joint hurts me from time to time and I only wore those things occasionally!
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I never wore that height except for the odd evening… really quite glad about that!
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Shoe freak here. Always love me a good shoe story! 🙂
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I like looking at them… not so much wearing them 🙂
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Sadly, there are a few I can now only look at in my own cupboard, lol. 🙂
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At least I cleared all those when I moved 🙂
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Never! 🙂
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LOL 😀
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Pingback: Writing Links in the 3s and 6…1/9/17 – Where Genres Collide
Thanks, Traci 🙂
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Very humorous and nice sounding poem with a reasonably just complaint about shopping for shoes.
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Thaks, Frank…. this is why I spend most of my time barefoot 🙂
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It’s when I read something like this that I’m happy to be a man. Shoes are decent and nice for us… and we don’t have to wear heels. Sometimes they are pricey but then they last for years…. so we are lucky
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I wear shoes as little as possible. That way, the oee comfortable pair that I own lasts much longer 🙂
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The whole poem is adorable but I LOVE this line ““They’re not designed to walk in!”” ha!
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That is a perfectly true incident, when the shoes fell apart the first time they got wet 🙂
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Hi Sue! It’s a pleasure to see you over at dVerse! I really enjoyed your ‘Heels’. I’m not a heel person, although I did wear platforms back in the day. I’m a fan of bare feet or Doc Martens, of which I have to pairs of knee high boots, one in tan and the other in purple, and they are just so comfy! I’m with you on this:
‘I’m happy with a lower heel
With comfort, sense and style,
Without inviting agony
If I should walk a mile’
and
‘While other women love their shoes
And shop the latest fashion
Shoe shopping is for me a chore…
I hate it with a passion!’
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Thanks, Kim. I still have the old heels in the bottom of the wardrobe, but never wear them… or only on those really special occassions when I don’t mind not being able to walk the next day 🙂 I go breoot or in the ligtest, most discrete footwear I can find…which is usually wholly unsuitable for the terrain or the weather 🙂
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🙂
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Sorry – that should read ‘two pairs…’ – it’s raining and I have stiff fingers today. 😦
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My keyboard is doing its own thing lately… my fingers usually have a mind of their own too. 😦
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I certainly identify with this wonderful poem — from stylish stilettos to orthopedic wedgies! Good write!
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Thanks, Bev. I’m well on the way myself. I still yearn for style sometimes, byt my toes override me and go for comfort.
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I wore platforms in the 70s, but never could get the hang of high heels, though I did try. At some point it just wasn’t worth the pain, anymore. Now my shoes are all about comfort.
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I wore heels all my life…got used to the extra inches. These days, it’s flat or barefoot.
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I can certainly relate to your poem!
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After a few decades of heels, I think most women might 😉
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Easy to relate to this, Sue. Love the poem, and I can just peer down at an angry red bunion to know, I’ve hung up my heels for good!
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My feet still look as if I could wear the things…the bones disagree, though.
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👣
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