Notes from a small dog ~ Connivance

She made me have a bath again,
It really wasn’t fair.
I thought that I’d be safe, you know,
Because my boy was there.

She even played me false on that,
And put me on the leash,
I saw a nice walk happening,
Got all excited… sheesh!

Instead she dumped me in the bath
And made him hold me tight,
Then hosed me down with smelly stuff
I’d thought I smelled alright!

She rubbed me down and brushed me,
Even tried to trim my feet!
“Don’t worry, girlie, when we’re done
We’ll have you smelling sweet!”

I struggled, but they had me caught,
Connivance would prevail,
Between them, they had won the day
…She even combed my tail!

As soon as she released me,
I shot straight out through the door!
I tell you, never trust a bitch*
With fewer legs than four!

* My two-legs informs me that it is impolite to use that term where human females are concerned… unless it is an accurate description.

Under the circumstances, I rest my case…

Much love, Ani xxx

About Sue Vincent

Sue Vincent is a Yorkshire-born writer and one of the Directors of The Silent Eye, a modern Mystery School. She has written a number of books, both alone and with Stuart France, exploring ancient myths, the mysterious landscape of Albion and the inner journey of the soul. She is owned by a small dog who also blogs. Follow her at scvincent.com and on Twitter @SCVincent Find her books on Goodreads and follow her on Amazon worldwide to find out about new releases and offers. Email: findme@scvincent.com
This entry was posted in Dogs, Humour, Photography, Poetry and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

83 Responses to Notes from a small dog ~ Connivance

  1. Deb Whittam says:

    That’s great … my four legs would agree completely

    Like

  2. Oh, my you went and gave her another bath. She is not happy with you at all!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. jenanita01 says:

    When it’s hot, I can think of better places to cool down and have a rinse. I expect you can too, Ani?

    Like

  4. Adele Marie says:

    Oh no….they caught you Ani. Not fair. What is wrong with our doggie smell? We loves it, other dogs love it. Sometimes two legs are hard to understand. Much paw love, Dante Dawg. xxx

    Like

  5. Ritu says:

    Oh Ani! Poor you… My teenage son would sympathise… He hates showers and baths too. 😁

    Like

  6. Mary Smith says:

    Oh, poor Ani 😦 But you look so beautiful!

    Like

  7. janmalique says:

    That look says it all Sue. Ani will drop the guilt inducing stare whenever she can now. xx

    Like

  8. Another bathing event for Ani. How sad, but otherwise living on an isle, she had to love water. πŸ˜‰ Best wishes for the Sunday! Michael

    Like

  9. ksbeth says:

    no more need be said, ani )

    Like

  10. V.M.Sang says:

    Poor Ani. But I love your poetry. It puts many human poets to shame! πŸ™‚

    Like

  11. lbeth1950 says:

    You wicked beast.!

    Like

  12. Poor Ani. But you look so beautiful now. ❀

    Like

  13. bobcabkings says:

    Ani, as I think you’ve noticed, we two-legs have very different relationship with smells than most four-legs do. It is odd, because our noses are so much less sensitive than yours. Still, I expect that your freshly combed tail is quite beautiful.

    Like

  14. bobcabkings says:

    Reblogged this on cabbagesandkings524 and commented:
    Ani suffers an indignity.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Darlene says:

    Oh, poor Ani! But you look so pretty now and probably smell better too. Dot doesn’t like baths either and one is due I think.

    Like

  16. Dale says:

    Hah!
    Zeke loathes baths, too…

    Like

  17. Hi Ani.

    They got me too yesterday!

    I didn’t mind at first, because we were just splashing in the water… I like doing that. Plus, I have to admit, it did make me feel good in the hot weather.

    But then they grabbed the bottle. You know the one, right? The one with the stuff in it that makes you smell funny, which they say makes you smell so pretty, or sweet, or whatever. There was no time to run, and no way of doing so with both of them there, so I ended up getting all covered in the stuff.

    Why couldn’t they just leave it at the splashing in the water part?

    Lots of licks,
    Lilie

    Like

  18. Maggie synpathises Ani, she’s had three showers in three weeks. Today was NOT a good day.

    Like

  19. Gibbs and The Duke are due for cleansing this week. I’m not sure if Duke has ever been bathed and we already KNOW that Gibbs hates it. Oh what fun!

    They think they smell their best when we think they smell worst πŸ˜€

    Like

  20. Anne Copeland says:

    Being the owners of four dog children and one foster dog child, we can definitely understand this. Ours, however, would love to go for a swim in the bathtub to cool off, but the bath stuff can go to someone else’s house. We don’t need it, and our mom should just give us a swim instead, and forget our nails.

    Like

  21. willowdot21 says:

    What can I say Ani, she did it with the best of intentions πŸ™ƒ. Love Ruby πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ

    Like

  22. Widdershins says:

    Ah Anj, it’s a dogs life, eh? πŸ™‚

    Like

  23. Joan says:

    Jimmy and Toby, two fellow canine sufferers, send their sympathy. These human intrusions are definitely a barking matter.

    Like

  24. Reblogged this on Where Genres Collide and commented:
    Lol.

    Like

  25. Jennie says:

    Love ya, Ani! ❀️

    Like

  26. dgkaye says:

    Lol clever Ani, now you’re clean and sparkly! πŸ™‚ xxx

    Like

  27. Reblogged this on Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life and commented:
    Ani has been connived into her least favourite place in the house.. the bath.. Sue Vincent has kindly transcribed her thoughts into verse….#recommended…

    Liked by 1 person

  28. trentpmcd says:

    I have a stupid question that my four-legs can never answer. They LOVE to go in the water! They will play like there is no place in the entire world better than the river, pond or salt water swamp. Of course, after a time in the salt water swamp, they need a bath (or so us two legs think). Why is it OK to play in the water, but not bath in it? Why do they shiver like they are being beaten? Why do they try to escape? Oh well, I guess us two legs just can’t understand…

    Like

  29. Jack Eason says:

    Reblogged this on Have We Had Help? and commented:
    Poor little Ani 😦

    Like

  30. C.E.Robinson says:

    Ani, at least you get a bath at home where you can protest a little! We go to the groomers EVERY month. We don’t get a choice. We’ve got long hair! It’s either that or a puppy cut! It gets us though, why Mom thinks a blueberry facial is so great for us! We’re BOYS. Hang in there Ani, it could be a lot worse! Sammy & Charley 🐢🐢

    Like

  31. Oh poor Ani! What torment.

    Like

  32. preetyvarma says:

    Nice Post… Ani was really beautiful

    Like

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