Reaction

Drawing by Theodor Kittelsen, 1911

Dear… well, you didn’t acually give me your name, did you? Just an acronym…

Congratulations! Yes, you managed it! You got a reaction!

I must apologise, however, for being such a disappointment. I know my reaction is possibly not quite the one you were hoping for.

I must say though, you did an excellent job. It is not through any lack of thoroughness on your part. I hold up my hands…mea culpa. It is not you. I am to blame…

I was, unfortunately, unable to respond in anger or confusion. I reprehensibly managed to resist that temptation. I failed to take an offensively defensive position, or even to to curl up in a foetal ball, wondering what I had done to offend you, how I could possibly appease you or change your obviously poor opinion of me.

The fact that you cast aspersions upon my person, methods, ethics and talents in one magnificently arrogant and wholly superfluous attack did not escape my notice. Nor did I fail to observe that the facts you cited were superbly incorrect and perfectly designed to undermine any lingering self-confidence that might remain after wading through the allusory morass.

And I? I did not even manage to weep at your words.

No.

I did something much worse than that.

I laughed.

Then sent you to my spam folder.

Any future such epistles will receive the same treatment, except that now, I will not need to waste my time reading them. So please, do feel free to continue sending them. I would much rather they came to my spam folder than have them land in the inbox of someone more fragile and susceptible to insidious sabotage. Did you know that the word ‘sabotage’ comes from the French…to ‘kick with a heavy wooden shoe’? In modern parlance, I suppose we would call it ‘putting the boot in’ or ‘kicking someone when they are down’. But, I digress… I’m sure you knew that.

I did track you down, you see… and found that your speciality is leaving provocative, if fairly irrelevant comments on perfectly good blogs.  I note that, sadly, you recieve very few responses to your vituperative tirades however, so I thought you might appreciate this one.

I am unsure quite what you expect to gain by lambasting people to no useful purpose. I did wonder if you were related to Wowbagger the Infinitely Prolonged. You know, the chap who fills immortality by insulting everyone in the universe in alphabetical order. You must have read Douglas Adams? No? Then, I suspect that you are merely bored and can find nothing more productive to do with your time than entertain yourself by attempting to devastate or anger perfect strangers.

I do understand that life can seem a drab, pointless affair, though. So, if you are in need of further amusement, may I recommend that you visit my Amazon pages?

If you press the little button that says ‘leave a review’, you can be as scathingly derogatory as you like. There are going on twenty books out there with my name on the spine, all of which are in need of further reviews. That should keep you occupied for a while.

You do not need to buy a copy… Amazon permits you to leave a review of a book acquired elsewhere… or, indeed, not read at all. Unfortunately, the lack of a ‘verified purchase‘ tag may alert potential buyers to the fact that you are simply amusing yourself, but don’t worry, Amazon’s own algorithms will take note of your comments. Sadly though, they will simply register another review…which will add to the tally and lead me ever-closer to being promoted by their services.

We both benefit, you see.

In conclusion, even though I did not add my contact page to the blog with the specific intention of allowing non-humans* access to my email inbox and time, I would like to thank you for getting in touch. Your visit was educational…I had never  encountered one of your kind before. I am happy that you found something here with which to amuse yourself and I am very grateful for your comments. As you will note, I have drawn much inspiration from them,

Kind regards,

Sue Vincent

*This is in no way intended to offend you, it is simply a recognition of the divergent evolutionary path of trolls as a non-human species.

 

About Sue Vincent

Sue Vincent is a Yorkshire-born writer and one of the Directors of The Silent Eye, a modern Mystery School. She has written a number of books, both alone and with Stuart France, exploring ancient myths, the mysterious landscape of Albion and the inner journey of the soul. She is owned by a small dog who also blogs. Follow her at scvincent.com and on Twitter @SCVincent Find her books on Goodreads and follow her on Amazon worldwide to find out about new releases and offers. Email: findme@scvincent.com
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95 Responses to Reaction

  1. Very classy response. I’m constantly amazed by how rude and nasty people can be. Love the way you rise above it so elegantly.

    Like

    • Sue Vincent says:

      I still cannot understand, Sarah, why anyone would waste their crafting such a long, acidic email to send to someone they do not know, simply to upset them in some way. It had no real relevence to anything I do! I’d never ‘met’ a troll before, apart from the publicly visible ones online, but can quite see how they could destroy someone’s confidence if they attack a weak spot.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Reading posts like yours is a good reminder of the senselessness of it all, the randomness of the choice of victim, and the need to hold your head up and carry on. A friend of mine abandoned her (early days) blog because of some stupid troll – a real loss for her (and for me).

        Like

        • Sue Vincent says:

          I can quite see how, if these random verbal blows hit a tender spot, they could be utterly devastating for the recipient. The perpetrators are simply cruel, vicious and can have nothing else in their lives to give them a sense of self-worth. Very sad, really.

          Liked by 2 people

  2. davidprosser says:

    Well put Sue.The temptation is always there to answer the trolls but it takes someone good to put the sabot on the other foot so to speak. I hope it felt as good as it looked.
    xxx Huge Hugs xxx

    Like

  3. A super response to something mean and unkind, Sue. I am learning so much from you as I know I would not have handled this so well. Love the picture!

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  4. Soul Gifts says:

    Excellent post! Congratulations to you 🙂

    Like

  5. alienorajt says:

    Well said, Sue! xxx

    Like

  6. floridaborne says:

    I’s beginning to wonder if the words “troll” and “narcissist” are interchangeable? It seems like they have a lot in common only the troll doesn’t have to pretend to like us first before trying to strip us of our self-worth. Hmmm….is there such a thing as a virtual narcissist?

    Liked by 1 person

  7. barbtaub says:

    Reblogged this on Barb Taub and commented:
    Sue Vincent nails it: “*This is in no way intended to offend you, it is simply a recognition of the divergent evolutionary path of trolls as a non-human species.”

    Liked by 1 person

  8. TanGental says:

    Well that was erudite as ever. I know what to do now… we’ll said Sue

    Like

  9. Ritu says:

    You go girl!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Excellent response Sue.

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  11. fransiweinstein says:

    When I was blogging on Huffington Post and weriting mostly about politics you wouldn’t believe the trolls I attracted and the things they said. I never took it personally, but it did, in the end, cause me to give it up because the negativity and ugliness just got to be too much. What’s staggering is how many sad, lonely, angry, miserable people there are in this world.

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  12. Mary Smith says:

    Brilliantly put, Sue. I’m sorry you’ve received such a nasty email, which makes it much more personal somehow than a public comment on a blog or FB page. Such sad people.

    Like

    • Sue Vincent says:

      Very sad, Mary. I know that had I recieved such a missive a few years ago, it would have crushed me. These days, not at all…but they could do serious damage to some people and quash a budding self-confidence very easily.

      Like

  13. trentpmcd says:

    I guess I’m lucky that the trolls ignore me. Great response, though! Not that the troll will read or understand if they actually do read it,but still, it made some of us smile (particularly the reference to the Hitchhikers series).

    Like

  14. dragonsdean says:

    Well said Sue, they must lead sad little lives….

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  15. pjlazos says:

    Wow, great response. There are a lot of people who just want the rest of the world to feel as badly as they do. Which begs the question: why are so many people disenfranchised?

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  16. Brilliant response, Miss Vincent, Ma’am.
    I have been trolled before and it really hurt my feelings for a while. 😦
    I got over it! 🙂
    Happy Reading and Writing!
    ~Icky. 🙂

    Like

  17. You have written a magnificent response which speaks for all of us. Thanks, Sue.

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  18. InfiniteZip says:

    YAY, well said Sue…..you do indeed rock!

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  19. Thank God I have never come across a troll as I am not sure how I would react. With your intelligence and wit , you have cut this moron completely down to size! Well done, Sue! xx

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  20. Eileen says:

    Do you suppose these are the work of cowards who go through life never speaking up to disagree or risk being different in the presence of others, so can only get all their frustrations out at a safe distance on strangers?

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    • Sue Vincent says:

      I don’t know, Eileen. I have often wondered… but somehow I doubt it. Sad to say, some folk just have a nasty, controlling streak and enjoy themselves at the expense of others.

      Like

  21. adeleulnais says:

    An excellent and witty response, Sue to a dimwitted troll. Why do they do it, I’ll never know and to be honest if it landed in my inbox I would have been upset, whatever they said. xx

    Like

  22. Widdershins says:

    Best response ever! 😀

    Like

  23. They seem to be running rampant these days, having seen several excellent writers shut down their blogs because of them. I always moderate comments to make sure they get no recognition. Some seriously need to get a life…

    Love your response!!!

    Like

  24. dgkaye says:

    Good for you Sue for wasting your good time responding so eloquently to a troll, lol. 🙂

    Like

  25. willowdot21 says:

    Dear Sue I will just add to everyone else’s praise of your response to whatever the troll said. I had trouble with a troll once on another website and in truth they almost made me ill. I would not let that happen again, i hope i could cope as well as you. bravo 💜💝❤️

    Like

  26. I got seriously trolled on Amazon … not for what I wrote, but for a review. Of a book about Alexander Hamilton. It was weird. Some people really need to get a life.

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  27. TamrahJo says:

    Hmmm…timely – Excellent response, but I recently responded to an ‘in-person’ attack, from one long in my circle, that does, rather, the whole thing, that, in reading your response, I realize, I curl up into a fetal ball and try to make right – and realized, it’s been YEARS! And, am I not rather tired of being trying to be the person I want to be ….and yet…not be the doormat they think I am? Hmmm…I’ve done the raging bull in china shop that doesn’t demolish with temper, just says, “Nope, done – ” but, definitely food for thought – as….what if, next time, they pick on someone more vulnerable than I? Thanks, yet again – definitely food for thought – 🙂

    Like

    • Sue Vincent says:

      Thanks, TamrahJo.. any human being deserves better than a doormat. I did that for long enough… no longer x

      Liked by 1 person

      • TamrahJo says:

        Yup….I’m about worked up to that point, again – just hoping to do it this time in incremental stages instead of waiting, gently reminding, more stern saying, before I revert to my dad’s DNA way of, “Obviously you won’t get the message until you’re either whining and thinking I’m the Devil for hurting your feelings” and/or delivering the message via the figurative baseball bat – – funny, I’ve been looking around me, more and more and thinking, yet again (revisit 10 years ago lessons) “Ya seriously won’t get it unless I’m really ‘rude, harsh, etc. You are seriously messing with my ‘compassionate, tolerant’ journey, ya know?!?” LOL

        Like

        • TamrahJo says:

          P.S. – NOW who’s whining?!? LOL – But yes, last week, I seriously had to wonder if the Universe was saying, “Okey-Dokey – ya swung your pendulum to far the other way – bring it back – oh? here’s a reminder, here’s another, and another, and one more, just in case you’re still analyzing/questioning – – ” LOL

          Like

        • Sue Vincent says:

          It isn’t up to us to change people’s mainds..they are responsble for their own. We just needto be responsible for our own journey and hope it might, possibly, be a useful lighton other’s paths. 😉

          Liked by 1 person

          • TamrahJo says:

            I still struggle with ‘conveying’ in way that says, “I’m not on board with that for my journey” without it sounding like I’m judging the other for their choices – I thought it was rather obvious when I just listened, but didn’t say “I agree” – but I’ve learned, silence makes folks think you’re on their wagon train – and oh, how many in the modern world roll out to destinations I have no interest in visiting or supporting as the ‘trending tourist spot’ – – LOL

            Liked by 1 person

            • TamrahJo says:

              In all honesty, though, I have to say, I may just be working my way ever more than before towards, “crusy-ole-fart-cynicism” – which is okay – I happen to like crusty ole farts – some of my fave folks – 😀

              Liked by 1 person

  28. Good for you, Sue. You thumped that troll with class. Perhaps it will now creep back under its bridge, or whatever hole or cave it crept out of. 🙂 — Suzanne

    Like

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