Bursting

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I have been dying to write this post…

Imagine the house hobbit bouncing up and down with glee… and a Mum prouder than you can imagine… and a heart full to bursting.

You know my eldest’s son’s story…how, four years ago, he was stabbed through the brain and left for dead in an alley, in an unprovoked and senseless attack. You may have read of the coma, the brain surgery, the struggle for survival. Perhaps read of the journey, the horrendous problems he faced… his magnificent and courageous efforts to defy the odds and recover. You may even have joined me in joy when he and little Faith became engaged. You may even have read, as so many have, the piece he wrote for the blog…. Possum Ergo Facit.

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It has not been an easy journey. No family expects to find themselves at the centre of a story that makes international news. No mother expects to see her child, whom she thought well established in home and career, lying helpless again, with sight, speech and movement no longer at his command, unable even to communicate enough to let her know he is still in there…. The prognosis was dire, the possibilities minimal, and his full-time, lifelong care… according to the medics…inevitable.

Speaking to a dear friend the other day of the way things have gone, I called his recovery ‘near miraculous’… my friend, quite rightly, simply answered, ‘Near?’

So the fact that my son called me this morning from Singapore, the best part of 7,000 miles away, where he is meeting his soon-to-be-bride’s family, is… to borrow a much abused, but totally accurate word here.. awesome.

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To get the photographs …see their happiness… see the possibilities unfolding for him as he once again grasps life with both hands and Lives it… is the most beautiful and inspiring thing. I cry a lot. Wouldn’t you?

We talked this morning about their plans for the future… and about the journey we have shared. We spoke of the turning within that has shown him how little the material things matter in this world when placed in the scales against the deeper, truer qualities of life. We spoke a lot about those scales… and he said that were what he has lost, through his injury and permanent disabilities, to be weighed against what he has learned and gained, in joy and a truer understanding of life, there would be no question which way the scales would tip…’Big time..’

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We spoke… and four years ago even that was impossible as he learned to communicate by spelling words laboriously on an alphabet board…of all the steps in the journey… unseen at the time, but each a necessary point on the way to the future that is now unfolding for him. It took courage to move into a home of his own, even with my daily and constant attendance. Leaving him that first night was terrifying… it was weeks before I could sleep … even if I did finally have a bed again instead of a floor to sleep on! It took courage the first time he attempted to walk down his hallway with the handrails… alone. So many fears to face and to look squarely in the eye before tackling them and moving forward.  And I smiled and encouraged and inside was a gibbering wreck of complex terrors and hope.

There have been times of utter despair and heartache, when it has overwhelmed and seemed an impossible task to keep on going, like slogging uphill through a vat of treacle.

Yet it was also a time of revelations and joy… I will never forget opening his gates and finding him standing in the garden waiting for me. It sounds such a small thing… but the daring, the physical control, the difficulties… the immediate fear and joy and hope that moment contained… in many ways that moment holds everything we had worked for.

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Nick will be home in a couple of weeks… and very soon I will, no doubt, cry some more as he and Faith become joined as husband and wife and a new chapter begins for them both.. you should hear the plans they are making! And for me too, as my role changes from carer back to just Mum… something I scarcely ever dared hope for.

Yes, I am mainly writing this post because I am so very proud and about as full to bursting as a small house-hobbit can get. But also because my son and my family have lived an extraordinary journey… one that is far from finished. It is a journey that is extreme… but it is one we all take, in greater or lesser degrees as we face the fears, difficulties and problems of each day on a journey to a wider life and awareness of possibility.

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When you are stuck in your fears, when the pain hits, it is overwhelming and there is no comparing it to that of others…it just hurts, it is immediate, and it is your universe… as, for so long, this was ours. I look at my son and his story and find inspiration in what he has achieved… and what can be achieved by the human spirit. You could not have predicted where the journey would take him. Miracles happen, though they may be as much human as they are Divine. But, as I watch him preparing to marry his beautiful little Faith, as I look back on where we were and forward to where they will stand in a little while, I know there is only one thing behind the miracles… and that is Love.

“It’s awesome how just as life can take everything away in an instant, it can do completely the opposite and become everything you’d ever wanted.” Nick Verron – my son.

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About Sue Vincent

Sue Vincent is a Yorkshire-born writer and one of the Directors of The Silent Eye, a modern Mystery School. She writes alone and with Stuart France, exploring ancient myths, the mysterious landscape of Albion and the inner journey of the soul. Find out more at France and Vincent. She is owned by a small dog who also blogs. Follow her at scvincent.com and on Twitter @SCVincent. Find her books on Goodreads and follow her on Amazon worldwide to find out about new releases and offers. Email: findme@scvincent.com.
This entry was posted in Life, Love and Laughter, Spirituality, Surviving brain injury, travel and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

30 Responses to Bursting

  1. newsferret says:

    You walked through a storm holding your head up high – boast about it as you earned the right to boast.

    Like

  2. What a journey of Courage, “Faith,” and incredible strength and beauty. Much love to you all. xo, Alethea

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  3. socialbridge says:

    This post is wonderful in every sense of the word ~ or ‘go hiontach ar fad’ to express ‘awesome’ in Irish!

    Like

  4. my heart is soaring

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  5. alienorajt says:

    And you jolly well should be proud, Sue – and, in your place, I, too, would be crying a lot. You and Nick have journeyed far – and it so LOVELY to read this latest part of the story. Heartwarming. I feel pretty tearful myself. Love to all of you. Ali xxx

    Like

    • Sue Vincent says:

      It has been an interesting journey, to say the least 🙂 And with weeks to go and the wedding cake to make I suddenly realised how close it all is… and I don’t have a thing to wear! *chuckles* I cling to the occasion… I want a hat! But don’t tell Nick.. he’ll probably veto it 🙂 Love and hugs xxx

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  6. Awesome and miraculous only skim the edges of what your feelings must be. I am so delighted for all of you, Sue, and wish Nick and Faith well on their journey.

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  7. prewitt1970 says:

    He’s standing!! Last a saw him he didn’t get up from his chair, that’s bloody brilliant!!! I too am jumping with joy for you and he. Hazaa Nick!!
    Sincerely
    Benjamin

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  8. SirenaTales says:

    So inspiring and wondrous! Reminds me of that quotation of Willa Cather’s: “Where there is great love there are always miracles.” Your abundant love for your son, his for you, the love you both have for life, and now the love of and for Faith all contributed, it seems, as well as tremendous courage and spirit. Congratulations and warmest wishes to all of you, with love

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    • Sue Vincent says:

      Thank you, Sirena. We aren’t finished yet.. 🙂
      There was so much love, prayers and support from all over the world.. and I cannot stress enough just how much that meant to us.. and still does.It really matters xxx

      Like

  9. ksbeth says:

    this gave me chills, made me cry, and took my breath away. i am so happy for all of you.

    Like

  10. theINFP says:

    It is heartening to know that magic, miracles and the marvellous exists in a world so often shadowed in despair, Robert x

    Like

  11. Jordis says:

    Sue, blessed be, such blessings and joy. A miracle, indeed. Gosh, much love to you, and your son and new family to be!

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    • Sue Vincent says:

      Wonderful, isn’t it, Jordis 🙂
      And in the middle of it all it is easy to forget how miraculous.. yet how can I, when the PTB seem to be chuckling and organising the pieces on the board with delight. 🙂

      Like

  12. phaerygurl says:

    Absolutely incredible! Good for your son for defying the odds against him, good for you for standing by him, and thanks the fates or whatever for he and Faith meeting. This is one of those stories you want to read about. Congratulations to him and Faith. Boast all you want, momma, you have well earned your right.

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