Diagnostics

Posted on April 13, 2017 by Sue Vincent

I hate waiting for phone calls. I spent a whole day waiting for two, knowing that by the time the garage had called with the final bill for fixing the car, I’d probably need the second call from the hospital. Or an ambulance.

The trouble is that whenever you are waiting for a call that you know should come in ‘any time now’, especially when (as with the garage) it could be bad news, you are stuck. You can’t do half the things that need your attention because you’ll have wet/dirty/dough-covered hands or be making too much noise to hear the phone ring. Or it will ring just when you can’t drop what you are doing. So, until five o’clock and closing time, you will twiddle your thumbs or halfheartedly tackle jobs that require less concentration because, let’s face it, you won’t be concentrating anyway.

I don’t know about you, but when I place a call first thing in the morning and I am sent to an answering machine that says, in offensively chirpy tones,‘Please leave your name and number and we will get back to you shortly…’, especially when it is a number you have been asked to call at that time, you expect them to get back to you. Eventually. Like, maybe… the same day.

So you start by doing all those quiet, non-messy, dry-handed jobs that need to be done. Like the ironing you’ve been putting off because you know that once you pack everything in the suitcases it will all crease anyway and you will wonder why you bothered… Then the day wears on. The simple jobs run out. You start looking for things you can do and trying not to look at what really needs to be done. Like the vacuuming or cutting the grass. Or walking the dog over fields where there is no signal.

The mind that is, by this time, incapable of concentrating on anything useful and productive wanders off down dark paths of fantasy instead. You are naturally worried to begin with… neither garages nor hospitals are without the potential for nasty surprises… By mid-afternoon your mind has managed to construct a garage bill that will require you to sell your soul. Which is fine, because you now feel that you won’t be needing it much longer by the time the hospital have, in lugubrious tones, broken whatever news they are going to come at you with this time. Even  though, at the start of the day, all you were expecting was for them to arrange a consultation.

It is an odd fact of life that when we start letting the imagination off the leash in this particular way, we never imagine anything positive. The garage is not, to your fretting mind, going to come up with a surprisingly low bill.* The hospital could not possibly phone with an ‘all’s well, not to worry, we don’t need to see you’.** The mind likes to wallow sometimes, in spite of your best efforts to the contrary. No matter how much of an optimist you may be, at times such as these, the imagination is perfectly capable of taking pessimism to a whole new level.

It all starts with a few basic, and quite justifiable expectations. Like expecting people to phone when they should. When they don’t, things go downhill and the expectations escalate. They no longer even have to bear and relation to reality… and the longer you have to wait for them to be fulfilled, the more frustrating it gets… and the more you start creating scenarios around all the ‘what ifs’ you can think of.

It isn’t just phone calls. We do it with people too; we create expectations that, when they remain unfulfilled (and why should they be when they are our expectations, not theirs) cause a snowball effect that can lead to an awful lot of emotional suffering.

By evening, one of the two expected calls has been received and you are reeling from the news. The other has not called back. You realise that a) you would really rather not have known anyway…either of them… and b) the entire day was wasted on ‘what if’… and you can do it all again tomorrow.

Or not.

There is a well-known quote, though I cannot for the life of me recall who said it, that if left long enough, all letters will answer themselves. So do phone calls. I decided that if I didn’t hear the phone ring, being busy with other things, they would either keep on calling or they will write (except in the case of an unpaid garage bill, at which point they will just hold my car as a hostage). So, I thought, I might as well stop worrying and do something useful.

Sure enough, the letter duly arrived from the hospital, advising me that they had tried to call. And could I please call them urgently…which I did… only to get an answering machine that says, in offensively chirpy tones,’Please leave your name and number and we will get back to you shortly…‘

*Actually, this was correct. They didn’t.

**They didn’t either. They just didn’t phone at all.

 

 

 

 

About Sue Vincent

Sue Vincent was a Yorkshire born writer, esoteric teacher and a Director of The Silent Eye. She was immersed in the Mysteries all her life. Sue maintained a popular blog and is co-author of The Mystical Hexagram with Dr G.M.Vasey. Sue lived in Buckinghamshire, having been stranded there due to an accident with a blindfold, a pin and a map. She had a lasting love-affair with the landscape of Albion, the hidden country of the heart. Sue  passed into spirit at the end of March 2021.
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32 Responses to Diagnostics

  1. Marilyn Armstrong says:
    April 13, 2017 at 06:14

    I so very much know exactly how you feel. The package you need to sign for that doesn’t show up and you get the note that says you weren’t home. Which means they didn’t even try to reach you. The calls they never made, say they made. Waiting for the kids to drop over yesterday but maybe tomorrow or maybe … ? I try not to take it personally, though I do anyway. Unless it really IS life or death, I just do whatever I need to do and hope for the best.

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  2. jenanita01 says:
    April 13, 2017 at 08:29

    I am thinking of having my phone removed, they can all just send me a letter… or not. I’m almost past caring one way or another… Bad enough waiting for an email…

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  3. Ritu says:
    April 13, 2017 at 09:08

    I think sometimes a letter is a better bet!

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  4. Victoria Zigler (@VictoriaZigler) says:
    April 13, 2017 at 11:01

    I’ve had way too many days like this lately, as well as a few similar ones with people who are supposed to show up at such-and-such a time and either arrive late or not at all. Really frustrating!

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  5. willowdot21 says:
    April 13, 2017 at 11:42

    Why oh! Why does this happen! I am afraid i am the type who would ring again until i got a human… They usually are the wrong human and i get passed around! My sympathies Sue but as my Dad always said if it is important they will get you!! 💝💜

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  6. patriciaruthsusan says:
    April 13, 2017 at 13:09

    What I love is when someone who’s supposed to come, makes the appointment, then doesn’t show up at all and you’ve stayed at home waiting for them. 😦 — Suzanne

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  7. Rae Longest says:
    April 13, 2017 at 15:49

    Some days, I do NOT leave my number for a call back; I get in the car and GO there, forcing them to deal with me IN PERSON!

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  8. Judy E Martin says:
    April 14, 2017 at 11:09

    I am dreadful at waiting for phone calls or important letters. I drive myself mad with scenarios that I have thought up and end up getting moody due to lack of concentration or sleep!
    I hope you get your calls soon, sue and that both are good news!!!! 😀

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  9. adeleulnais says:
    April 14, 2017 at 12:11

    You are correct, Sue. I spent this morning waiting for a call back from the doctors, I got it but I was left doing things which let my imagination run wild. xx p.s. hope everything is okay.

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  10. Kate McClelland says:
    April 14, 2017 at 21:22

    So, so true this Sue

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