Expression of life, photographer unknown.
“Do you mind?” Well, yes, actually, I do… choking on a filched Brazil nut from his breakfast is not the most enjoyable of experiences, even if it does serve me right. I splutter an incoherent reply between coughs. “You can stop this dying malarkey right now.”
I hate to disillusion him. “Well, not exactly, I can’t…”
“Why not?” You could see he just knew he’d made a mistake with that question.
“Because we are all doing it, all the time, bit by bit…” He rolled his eyes in that ‘I can feel a blog post coming on’ way that has become part of the unspoken vocabulary around here. We’ve had the conversation before, of course, of how, permission being granted or not to go permanently AWOL from his kitchen, one of these days I won’t be turning up for work. He put his foot down with a firm hand and broke in on my philosophising before I’d picked up speed. A tactic I consider a little unfair.
“You’re not allowed.” There was that finality in his tone that brooks no further argument, so I dutifully carried on preparing the stuff for his vile green smoothie, wondering if there exists some kind of rescue operation for the fruit and vegetables destined to become the horrid, if healthy, concoction in his blender.
I am a tad suspicious however of the coincidental concern of my sons just lately. They seem to be taking a preternatural interest in my longevity all of a sudden. Both of them. Were I a nonagenarian I could understand it, but I do not consider myself to be in my dotage, physical or mental, quite yet, so I have to wonder what may have convinced them of incipient decrepitude. Small instances of their care have manifested… things like vitamin supplements… It makes you wonder…
Mind you, I have noticed that they too are growing into themselves in new ways, an inevitable consequence of the passing of time and the evolution of the roles we each play in life, both our own and the lives of others. From infancy to childhood, youth to maturity and onwards towards, with a little luck, the wisdom of age learned from a life richly coloured by experience from all ends of the spectrum.
The rhythm of care shifts as we go through those decades and we who were children, once dependant, become ourselves those who watch over the wellbeing of those we love as we become partner, parent, aunt or uncle. With the assumption of that role of care we also turn our eyes outward from the self-absorption of youth and see those who cared for us when we were small in a different light and in turn offer our care as they grow older. Yet the cycle continues as the very old take newborn babes in their arms and croon lullabies of their own long ago, conjuring stories to share with upturned faces that tell of a world long since passed into the mists of memory.There is beauty in that rhythm, a natural beauty like that of the seasons that slowly turn, growing new life beneath a blanket of fallen years.
Sue Vincent's Daily Echo 
This is fabulous, Sue; I absolutely loved it. So damned true! Now off to share it! xxx
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Thanks, Ali. 🙂 xxx
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Beautiful.
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Thank you Eilis 🙂
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This is simultaneously a beautiful and frightening reflection.
I am afraid because I am beginning to have to look after my folks and that’s an upsetting thing… but I’m also scared because I haven’t got anyone at the other end of this cycle…
Then what happens I wonder?
ff
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There is a sadness that the old extended families are breaking down and many may find themselves facing this alone where once there may have been a network of people who could help.. On the other hand, we do not know who we may meet or how much care and friendship may come into our lives…or when.
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We are an extended family, but perhaps TOO extended to be really useful. Generations are so separated by so many things and everyone is so busy. It’s almost pathological. I just hope we never really need them. Not more than a very little bit.
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Modern movement has put that distanc between a lot of families, I think. We have the feeling of closeness because of the varied and instant means of communication, but it isn’t quite the same of having that local cluster of people. is it?
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a lot to ponder about this cycle of life, about those we have cared for, continue to care for, and the wondering of who will care for us when that time comes. And still, we have only today to live and enjoy. That’s what makes this all such an amazing journey in the long run, I think.
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It is a rather wondeful design as a basis, though many fall through that net of care now that we have moved away from that central heartfire of community. But yes, there is only this moment to embrace…
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Reblogged this on theowlladyblog.
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I am certain you well deserve their care and hope you’ll accept it. Sorry I haven’t been reading your posts. Still sick with a long flu and cannot post either. Will try to read soon. xx ellen
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Oh Ellen! Hope you get well very soon and back on your feet. Flu is such a miserable thing to be stick with xxx
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Thank you, Sue!! Hope you are back to yourself by now.
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So far so good, Ellen xx
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