Irony…?

Wales 054

I want to have a cold tonight

And if you think I’m mad,

I have a real good reason…

The alternative’s too bad.

*

My head is really aching

And my eyes are awful sore,

The box of tissue’s empty

And I haven’t any more.

*

I’ve taken antihistamines

Because I thought I should

But even double dosage

Hasn’t done a lot of good.

*

I’ve checked the first aid cupboard

And there’s nothing useful in it.

I’m feeling pretty miserable

And sneezing every minute.

*

My nose is sore and tickling

It drives me up the wall…

So why would anybody

Want to have a cold at all?

*

I’ve just moved to a rural place

Surrounded all in green

With fields and grass and wildflowers

As pretty as I’ve seen.

*

And, as my nose is just as damp

As that of a retriever…

If I don’t have a proper cold…

It has to be hayfever.

About Sue Vincent

Sue Vincent is a Yorkshire-born writer and one of the Directors of The Silent Eye, a modern Mystery School. She writes alone and with Stuart France, exploring ancient myths, the mysterious landscape of Albion and the inner journey of the soul. Find out more at France and Vincent. She is owned by a small dog who also blogs. Follow her at scvincent.com and on Twitter @SCVincent. Find her books on Goodreads and follow her on Amazon worldwide to find out about new releases and offers. Email: findme@scvincent.com.
This entry was posted in Humour, Photography, Poetry and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

73 Responses to Irony…?

  1. ghostmmnc says:

    I like your poem, but am sorry that you have the hay fever!

    Like

  2. Ritu says:

    I feel your pain Sue!!!

    Like

  3. ellenbest24 says:

    Oh NO! A virus it could be a virus… gret poem though😇

    Like

  4. Oh Sue, I hope you’re not permanently going to suffer.

    Like

  5. A thin layer of vaseline just inside your nostrils will catch the pollen before it reaches your sensitive hairs in the nose particularly before you go outside…. if you have some chamomile tea then drink three cups a day with a teaspoon of honey – local honey will desensitise you to the local pollens. Also drink hot lemon with honey as the lemon will give you a Vitamin C boost. An onion a day with every meal and garlic too if you can take it as it too helps with hayfever. If it is a cold all of the above will ease the symptoms.But the vaseline does work well. xx

    Liked by 2 people

    • Sue Vincent says:

      I shall follow your advice, Sally. Funnily enough, after decades of not even being able to stomach the smell of honey, I have been craving the stuff lately. I do think the body usually knows what we need if we listen. xx

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Oh and change you pillowcase every day as your hair collects pollen and you then rub your face in it all night! xx

    Like

  7. merrildsmith says:

    Hope you feel better soon!

    Like

  8. Great poem, and I totally get it. ☺

    Like

  9. reocochran says:

    I hope you do have a cold because allergies are forever! I have friends who never had allergies (like hay fever) and have developed them after fifty years old. I am hoping you will be over this soon and not a reoccurring event. 😦 hugs, Robin

    Like

  10. Oh no. The price of bucolic beauty, Sue. You will adjust. Drink lots of local honey in your tea.

    Like

  11. Mary Smith says:

    I hope it’s a cold. I’ve never had hay fever but this summer for the first time ever I’ve been constantly blowing my nose and someone said it might be hay fever. Apparently it can develop even if you;ve never had it before. I’m not as bad as you and other than the irritation of having to blow my nose many times a day I’ve not had any other symptoms. Maybe the pollen count has been unusually high this year?

    Like

    • Sue Vincent says:

      I’ve never had it either, Mary, and don’t intend to start now, whatever my nose and eyes may think. It really would be unfortunate with all the fields… If the rapeseed was in flower, I could understand it.

      Like

  12. Poor thing! About the cold/hayvfever (hopeful cold), but congrats on the move. 🙂 Wonderful and funny poem!!

    Like

  13. If you never had hay-fever before you moved, I hate to say it, but, there may be something pollinating near your new place that you haven’t come across before. I usually have to have a steroid/cortisone shot whenever I go over to England! Good luck and great poem!

    Like

  14. We live in an oak woods with three dogs. Antihistimines are us.

    Like

    • Sue Vincent says:

      I take the things every day anyway for the ‘itchies’ that started with the stress of Nick’s attack and never left. Hayfever I do not have. Or I’d better not… never have before!

      Like

  15. Eliza Waters says:

    Great little ditty, Sue. Sorry your allergies are making you miserable!

    Like

  16. It’s funny, allergies. I am now allergic to things I was never allergic to and I’m no longer allergic to things I once was allergic to. I don’t get it. My grandmother ate strawberries all her life. At eighty-five years old, she suddenly became very allergic to them. I think our body chemistry changes over time.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sue Vincent says:

      It does, and allergies are aquired. I used to have a fabulous collection of earrings… then became allergic to most metals except gold and silver. Which doesn’t sound much until you consider bras, fasteners and medical use.

      Liked by 1 person

  17. Susan Scott says:

    Lots of advise in comments below Sue😄 Lovely lament, hope you get better soon

    Like

  18. barbtaub says:

    I’ve tried everything here, and none of it works. So now anybody coming from the States gets a simple plea from me: Allegra D!!!!!

    Like

  19. my hay fever developed late in life – but I’ll never retreat from the countryside

    Like

  20. jenanita01 says:

    I can sympathise, Sue. It has recently been suggested that at the ripe old age of 72, I have developed hayfever. You couldn’t make it up, could you?
    Hopefully, you haven’t…

    Like

  21. Judy Martin says:

    Oh No! I feel for you Sue. My daughter gets hayfever and it seems pretty miserable 😦

    Like

  22. dgkaye says:

    Very clever poem Sue. Sorry to hear about your ‘erm, hayfever. 🙂

    Like

  23. Widdershins says:

    Blergh!!! I hate hay fever. I feel like I want to rip my face off and wring it out. I hope whatever it is passes really quickly.

    Like

  24. Éilis Niamh says:

    Ouch! I was lucky when I got attacked by allergies in Ireland, Zyrtec actually helped. Made me a bit drowsy, but nothing that some guinness couldn’t fix. 🙂 Hope things have settled down a bit!

    Like

    • Sue Vincent says:

      I’m hopeful it was just a cold as Nick had the same thing and lives five miles away… but I see him every day, so we generally catch the same viruses. 🙂

      Like

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    Like

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