Notes from a Small Dog: Stuck

I am offended.

I was always told it wasn’t nice to laugh at another’s misfortune. ‘Specially when they are s’pposed to be your best friend.

I always knew my two-legs needed more training.

Anyway, I’ll tell you about it and you can make your own mind up.

We woke up this morning to a frozen world. Everything was white and even the muddy lawn was crispy. She stood shivering on the doorstep while I went out to explore, but as it was still dark, I didn’t keep her there too long.

By the time I’d had my breakfast, though, the sun was just starting to come up and the sky was all pretty and pink. I thought she would like to stand at the door with me… but no, she just opened it and went in again to put another jumper on.

I do find that a bit confusing… You two-legses seem to spend a lot of time shaving your fur off, then complain when you get cold…

But anyway, back to my story.

I’d done my morning patrol around the garden and, as I’d just had breakfast, I thought I should have a nice drink of water.

Now, I always have water inside, where she keeps my bowls, but she also leaves me a big bowl of water just outside the big window-door, so I can have a drink wherever I am. And I like that water better… don’t know why, I just do.

So I stuck out my tongue for really good drink… and the water bit me!

Not just that… it was hard and my tongue stuck to it!

I looked in through the window a her… sort of hoping she’d come and rescue me. She had already seen what was happening and was laughing fit to burst!

I ask you, is that nice?

I’m just glad the camera thingy wasn’t anywhere close by… else it would probably have taken her even longer to come to my aid. Mind you, I’d unstuck by then and tapped the water with my paw to see what was going on.

“You daft dog, it’s only ice,” says she. Only ice? Isn’t it her duty to sort it out before it attacks me?

I had another couple of licks, and sure enough, it was just ice… though I have to say, it doesn’t taste as nice without the cream bit.

“It’s winter,” says she. Well, you know, I had noticed that…

“Never mind, girlie,” she says as she’s thawing out my bowl, ” you might have snow soon.”

That’s the one good thing I have to say about her… she always sees the bright side.  But then she tells me she’s had snow already!

Honest, how mean can you get?

So, I may just ignore her for a bit.

Unless she brings home anything nice to eat.

Much love,

Ani xxx

P.S. Don’t forget to send me your
letters to Santa for my Advent Calendar!


Ani, the inimitable Small Dog, told of the trials of training her two-legs in ‘Notes from a Small Dog: Four Legs on Two‘. Their poetic adventures continued in ‘Laughter Lines: Life from the Tail End’. You can read Robbie Cheadle’s review of Doggerel HERE.

 

Doggerel: Life with the Small Dog

Available now in paperback and for Kindle

via Amazon UK, Amazon.com, Amazon.de and Amazon.fr

In her latest collection of poems, their daily life together takes centre stage. From the perfidy of humans who insist on bathing dogs, to the unpunctuality of writers at mealtimes, the relationship between two legs and four is explored in verse.

The Small Dog reveals her continuing fascination with chicken, tennis balls and the compulsion to re-write Shakespeare, while exposing her two legs’ misdemeanours to the world.

 

About Sue Vincent

Sue Vincent was a Yorkshire born writer, esoteric teacher and a Director of The Silent Eye. She was immersed in the Mysteries all her life. Sue maintained a popular blog and is co-author of The Mystical Hexagram with Dr G.M.Vasey. Sue lived in Buckinghamshire, having been stranded there due to an accident with a blindfold, a pin and a map. She had a lasting love-affair with the landscape of Albion, the hidden country of the heart. Sue  passed into spirit at the end of March 2021.
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85 Responses to Notes from a Small Dog: Stuck

  1. mbrazfieldm says:

    Too cute it hurts 💕💕💕💕

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ritu says:

    Oh Ani 🥰🤣
    Life is a series of discoveries for us all 😘

    Liked by 1 person

  3. willowdot21 says:

    Oh! Ani that two legs of yours needs whipping ( metaphorically speaking) into line…. Mind you mine are no where near as sensible as we are 💜💜 love Ruby 💜

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Darlene says:

    Oh, Ani! My favourite water dish is outside too but t doesn’t freeze here so I am OK. I won’t go outside if it snows. (It only happened once and it was awful!!) My human parents laughed at me then too. Your buddy, Dot!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. beth says:

    aw, I totally get your upset. don’t feel bad, the two-legs here who are young, also love to go outside in the fluffy cold white stuff and often get their tongues stuck on things.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. jenanita01 says:

    Your two legs shouldn’t have laughed at you, Ani… you could have been stuck there for ages…

    Like

  7. acflory says:

    Oh Ani, I’m so sorry you got stuck. But tell me, why do you love the snow so much?

    Like

  8. Sadje says:

    I agree it’s not nice to laugh at others specially small dogs.

    Like

  9. queadrian says:

    I love your best friend, Sue Vincent❤🌹😁

    Like

  10. Alli Templeton says:

    Poor Ani, being bitten by that nasty frozen water. It was a bit of a baptism of ice to venture out into a suddenly white world this week, but there’s no denying, it does look beautiful. 🙂

    Like

  11. Violet Lentz says:

    Poor Ani. I know from experience that is a very scary feeling having ones tongue stuck like that…

    Like

  12. I really enjoy the “Notes from a Small Dog” series.Such a wonderful, engaging little character!

    Like

  13. V.M.Sang says:

    It was very rude of her to laugh when the water bit you, Ani. And I agree with you. It’s not as nice without the cream!

    Like

  14. This by far had me laughing so darn hard, I had to take a break and go to the restroom. LOL!
    I can only imagine the voice that Ani cames with when I am reading these adorable tales… I can’t help but laugh and then I ant to hug the heck out of her.
    Great stories!!!💖

    Like

  15. joylennick says:

    Hi Ani, Here’s wishing YOU lots of lovely snow, but I don ‘t think that your ‘two legs’ wants THAT MUCH! It’s a bit of a problem,I’d say.. x
    .

    Like

  16. Mary Smith says:

    Oh, Ani, how awful to have the water bite you like that – on the other hand I can see the funny side of it, too. Though I’m sure your two-legs didn’t mean to offend you 🙂

    Like

  17. dgkaye says:

    Lol Ani, you’re lucky you didn’t rip your tongue. Please stick to the indoor water until the thaw. 🙂 ❤

    Like

  18. Widdershins says:

    Oh Ani, I’m sorry to say I laughed at your predicament also. In my my defense all I can say is that it wasn’t a nasty laugh, more of a rumbling sympathetic chuckle. Can you ever forgive me?

    Like

  19. That was mean of her to laugh. I told Mummy so too, because she laughed when she read your post. Bad humans. Glad you weren’t stuck for long. Hope she gave you something nice afterwards to make up for laughing at you. Lots of licks, Lilie

    Like

  20. Adele Marie says:

    I hopes your tongue is okay, Ani, much paw love, Dante the Dawg. xxx

    Like

  21. Ani, i am feeling sorry for you too. What experiences ice without any smell, and cold but not as hell. 😉 Sharpen your claws for the next walkout. There will be ice on the ways too. Best wishes, with love! Michael

    Like

  22. Denis1950 says:

    Ani, see if you can find a spider, a big one and herd it inside.

    Like

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