It’s been one of those days where you’re glad when its done;
The glacial warehouse had opened at one
I had gone for my costume, that still didn’t fit,
And I stood while she pulled, tucked and pinned it a bit.
I’d ordered it months ago, thinking ahead,
No panic, this April, be ready instead…
But last minute mayhem once more has ensued
And if she can’t sort out the sewing…I’m screwed.
The pattern, you see, had ignored that I’m small,
I’m vertically challenged, a bit under-tall…
The bodice, therefore, was not much to my taste
With the neckline descending too close to my waist.
The waistline itself sat quite well…on my hips!
“Hold steady,” she said through the pins in her lips,
“I don’t understand, it is really quite strange.
Can you still move your arms? No? I’ll just rearrange…”
The bodice moved north, which was all well and good,
And it brought up the waist so it sat where it should,
But the measurements, falsified by meagre height,
Now left me bare shouldered, it still wasn’t right.
She tugged and she pinned at the fabric once more,
Till the floor-sweeping velvet did not touch the floor.
With the stuff sticking out all around here and there,
Instead of quite shapely, I now looked quite… square.
And I know I’ve lost weight! I’d been feeling much slimmer,
Yet felt like a turkey all trussed up for dinner.
As I stood bundled up in my satins and laces,
My nerves were on edge, being put through their paces.
With one week to go, well…my courage may falter,
Can she pull it off? Can she tweak, stitch and alter?
Will it all turn out right on the night, or the day?
Should I panic instead… and start trawling ebay?
For comfort and vanity both have their uses,
You get them just right and the creative juices
Can really start flowing and carry the day…
And leave you in peace to get on with the play.
Terrible…
LikeLiked by 1 person
The verse or the situation? 🙂
LikeLike
You need to ask?…
LikeLike
Mere doggerel 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
I just love this! I too am “vertically challenged, a bit under-tall” and things often need adjusting. Well put, had me in stitches!! (pun intended)
LikeLiked by 2 people
You’ll understand the problem, then, Darlene… 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Reblogged this on The Militant Negro™.
LikeLike
Your presence next week will inhabit that costume splendidly Sue.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It will have to 😉 Thanks, Jan x
LikeLiked by 1 person
Onwards to the mysteries that wait. x
LikeLike
Not long now 😀 x
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know…🤗 x
LikeLike
Eeeek! 😀 x
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re making me nervous now. 😵
LikeLike
It’s just all the stuff I still have to do, pack and locate…. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
I don’t envy you…😐
LikeLike
I enjoy it really, but don’t tell my menfolk 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Reblogged this on anita dawes and jaye marie.
LikeLike
Thank you, ladies 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have the other kind of problem, being far too tall for my own good. No one seems to make trousers long enough, and I am now totally fed up looking… time to get the sewing machine out (if I can remember how to use it!)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Have you tried Long Tall Sally? They specialise in tall sizes…. and there are some great bargains on ebay sometimes.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Long Tall Sally is great for special items, but can’t afford to buy everything there…
LikeLike
I can understand that, but as I said , there are some great bargains on ebay 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
I will be checking that out, as there are a few items of clothing that desperately need replacing!
LikeLike
I always try ebay first. I’d rather pay a little for good quality than a lot for ‘fashion’ 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have bought clothes on Amazon, so it could be time to try ebay now!
LikeLike
I love ebay for clothes. Things I really could not afford can be picked up, sometimes for pennies.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have just had a peak, and I see what you mean! I will be having a better look later…
LikeLike
Hope you get lucky 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
XXX
LikeLiked by 1 person
Being a bit ‘celingward oriented’ myself I could never find women’s pants (trousers) that fit, (and don’t even ask about enough pocketses) so I took up sewing my own too … sew on, I say! 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
I always wanted to sew well… oddly enough, I can create costumes and robes… but not clothes. Maybe I should still to robes… they are comfier anyway 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
We could start an new fashion trend. 🙂
LikeLike
I wish! They are so much more flattering, as well as confortable 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
And think of all the magnificent fabrics one could get away with wearing! 😀
LikeLike
I know. I love going to Glastonbury, where ‘anything goes’ for that reason 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nothing else for it, really!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Reblogged this on Die Erste Eslarner Zeitung – Aus und über Eslarn, sowie die bayerisch-tschechische Region!.
LikeLike
Thanks, Michael 🙂
LikeLike
We want photos! 🙂
LikeLike
Doubtless the workshop will produce some 😉
LikeLike
Reblogged this on Viv Drewa – The Owl Lady.
LikeLike
Thanks for sharing, Viv xxx
LikeLike
Being a dressmaker I can relate to your plight. I’m had women bring me gowns or dresses that were either too small for them and they expected me to work miracles. Sometimes I could other times no way. Or I’d get women with gowns that were much too big and would require me to actually take the entire gown apart and cut it down to size.
Your poem brought back my memories of my dressmaking days. Thank you, Sue.
Hugz to you and Ani! @v@ ❤
LikeLike
That’s a skill I have always admired… I sew with burnt thread, as my granny used to say.
The problem here was that te costume was being made to measure…. 😉 xxx
LikeLike
Break a leg – you just may if the costume doesn’t fit right! 😉
LikeLike
Having picked it up now… I just may 😉
LikeLike
clever verse Sue! Hope it works out in the end …
LikeLike
So do I, Susan… not much time left now 😀
LikeLike
Love the term Sue – under tall, lol. ❤
LikeLike
It makes achange from ‘short’ 😉 xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, subtle too. 🙂 xx
LikeLike
🙂 xxx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hugs! Hope it fits! I have this issue when I have to go to any public events where you need to dress up, lol. I never seem to lose the weight that plagues me though I did lose fifty last year. This thyroid keeps me from losing any lately though.
LikeLike
It gets worse as you get older, doesn’t it? I never appreciated that slim waist when I had it 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know! It’s SO hard now!
LikeLike
Tell me about it 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re going to be the belle of the ball. 😀
LikeLike
I’ll be what I am suppsed to be… and I get to play a sort of baddie this year 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person