Replay – A never-empty nest – Guest post by Ritu

Posted on December 17, 2015 by Sue Vincent

I like having friends over – even when they have me blushing…  My guest today is Ritu Bhathal-Padhaal – from But I Smile Anyway. Ritu is a writer and blogger and was voted into third place for Most Inspiring Blog at the Annual Bloggers Bash Awards. You can read some of her work on her blog… like the serialised Wedded Stress. Today, she talks about being a daughter… and a Mum.

Untitled1The lovely Sue from the blog The Daily Echo invited me to write a guest post for her, and I was extremely honoured, and I have to say, a tad scared! If you are a regular reader of Sue’s blog, you know how amazingly she writes, and I don’t consider myself to have half the talent that she possesses!

Still, what to write about? I have to say, I was thinking, the other day on the 8Th October, that as it was National Poetry Day, I should really try and write a verse… I started it, but it wasn’t happening. The thing is, I had been running on empty the last few weeks, with a tough new Nursery teacher job, and the added stress of applying for secondary schools for my first child, Lil Man, as he is fondly known on my blog. Then this request turned up, and the poem kind of wrote itself!

I have two little munchkins at home, Lil Man is 10 and Lil Princess is 7. A long time to go yet really before they gain that independence, and go out into the big, wide world alone. But one day, they will. And I would never want to be a hindrance to them gaining their own experience in life.

I was always lucky, as a young Indian girl, that my parents gave me the freedom, and choice, to go out there, and actually live my life as I wanted. I spent my school days doing what I was expected, then when it was time for University, I decided to try Kingston University, which meant leaving home, and moving Dahn Saf (Down South!). My brother was also away, at a boarding school, so suddenly they went from having both their children around, to having none… Yet that was not something that bothered them. They actively encouraged us to get our educations, and live our lives, to gain experiences, and create our own memories, safe in the knowledge, that home was always there for us.

Untitled3As a mother myself now, I wonder what my mother would have been feeling like, what my Pops was thinking, seeing off their precious babies, and I realised that even though we had gone, we never really left. We had our rooms, and all our things around, and it was always ready for us when we returned. They have moved house since I married and shifted to Kent permanently, yet there is still a room for me, and my family, when we go to visit them. They are getting older, but they are most definitely not old, if you know what I mean. And only now they have started thinking that they may need to downsize… 5 bedrooms may be too much for them, on a day to day basis. But what holds them back is the thought that there wouldn’t be space for us, when we come to visit. We reassure them that whatever they decide, we will always call their home, our home too. Even if we have to sleep on floors, or sofas, or even book into hotels, that isn’t a problem. To be honest, for us, home isn’t where our stuff is, it’s where they are, and all our memories will go with us, and with them, wherever they may go.

God forbid, when the time comes for our chicks to spread their wings, even though I know it will be hard to imagine them out there, alone in that big bad world, away from us, I know they will be ok. And every step I take in our home, I will see something that reminds me of them, something that will make me smile, possibly bring a tear to my eye. And more importantly, I know they will always be welcome back home.

This verse I wrote sees a nest as both a dwelling, but also my heart… A place my children will always accommodate, no matter where they are, or how old they are.

children

Our Never Empty Nest

Our little nest, one time, was bare
A mere shell, there was no one there
Then you came, to illuminate
This home you helped us to create
We furnished it with memories
Times we can recall with ease
Each day you add another layer
And I silently offer up a prayer
Thank you Lord for giving me
These branches of my family tree
I know one day that you will fly
And believe me, you will soar high
You’ll leave this nest to build your own
But I’ll not lament that you have flown
For it’s no longer an empty shell
It’s now a home in which we dwell
And embedded in each and every space
Is the image of your smiling face
The sounds of laughter will always ring out
Whether or not you are about
This nest will always be your home
No matter where you decide to roam.
Ritu 2015

About Sue Vincent

Sue Vincent was a Yorkshire born writer, esoteric teacher and a Director of The Silent Eye. She was immersed in the Mysteries all her life. Sue maintained a popular blog and is co-author of The Mystical Hexagram with Dr G.M.Vasey. Sue lived in Buckinghamshire, having been stranded there due to an accident with a blindfold, a pin and a map. She had a lasting love-affair with the landscape of Albion, the hidden country of the heart. Sue  passed into spirit at the end of March 2021.
This entry was posted in Blogging, Books, Life, Love, Memories, Motherhood, Poetry and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

32 Responses to Replay – A never-empty nest – Guest post by Ritu

  1. NJ says:
    October 12, 2015 at 06:36

    First of all applaud for sue for bringing Ritu as a guest writer 🙂
    Ritu you have written a marvelous piece dear 🙂 My parents too live alone from the time me and my bro completed our high schools … But where ever I live that feeling when I lend up in my home is amazing 🙂 It has its warmth and peace:) that I don’t find anywhere else 🙂 It is and it will always be my home 🙂 I love the poem 🙂 Have you made your children read this beautiful poem ? I am sure they will love it ❤ … may be they will not understand it's depth now but years later when they will lend home from some other place 🙂 they will connect with it emotionally 🙂

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  2. Ritu says:
    October 12, 2015 at 06:56

    Firstly, thank you Sue, for having me over! Secondly, thank you NJ for your words!!! You’re right, it doesn’t matter what age, that feeling of going home never changes! I haven’t read it to them, but I will do! 😊

    Like

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  3. Ritu says:
    October 12, 2015 at 06:57

    Reblogged this on But I Smile Anyway… and commented:
    The wonderfully talented Sue Vincent over at The Daily Echo asked me to guest post for her… Here it is peeps!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  5. vanbytheriver says:
    October 12, 2015 at 14:52

    That is so beautiful, Ritu, I feel exactly that way about my own adult children. They never really left at all. Home will always be wherever we gather. Smiles wide !! ❤️

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply
  6. D. Wallace Peach says:
    October 12, 2015 at 15:48

    Great guest post, Ritu and Sue. I love the poem that so beautifully captures the joy of parenting. We help our fledglings find their wings. They leave the home, but never the nest we’ve built in our hearts. Thank you ladies for the smile.

    Liked by 1 person

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  7. edwinasepisodes says:
    October 12, 2015 at 18:05

    That was a lovely post Ritu. You are so right about how our children make our homes into so much more with their presence, Thanks also to you Sue 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

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  9. Erika Kind says:
    October 12, 2015 at 22:38

    Ritu is such a gem. How wonderful you invited her for a guest post 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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  10. raphaela99 says:
    October 13, 2015 at 01:22

    Love to you, Sue and to Ritu! xxx

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  11. macjam47 says:
    October 15, 2015 at 13:51

    Very beautifully written, Ritu. The empty-nest is something that always seemed so far in the future, until the day it arrived. There is always room at our house for our children and their families. Do I miss the days when they were young and at home? Sure, I do. There is nothing like the sound of that door swinging open and one of my children shouting (even though I am just a few feet away), “Hey Mum, where are my brothers?” I could count on it. All three of my sons had this very same greeting. It was a very happy time of my life. Now, I look at them and am amazed at what wonderful, productive young men they have become, contributing to society, and raising their own families. I always told them they could be whatever they wanted to be, and liver wherever they wanted to live. Off and on, they have all lived away, or at times one would live nearby. I’ve learned that even when they live far away, when you are together it is as though you were never apart. Enjoy them now, but I promise, there are greater things ahead for you and for them.

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