5 observations on the necessity of owning a feather duster…

To some the humble feather duster may conjure nostalgic visions of French maids and uniforms, to others they are a rather retro adjunct to the broom cupboard. To me, they are a necessity. Every home should have one. No question. I can give you my reasons…

1. They are, obviously, useless for really dusting… on the other hand you can whip round with a feather duster and do the entire house in less than five minutes without moving a thing when you get that call to say unexpected guests will arrive in ten… For a writer, this is paramount, as dusting comes a long way down the scale of priorities when in full flow.

Plus it gives you five minutes to get out of the pyjamas and make yourself presentable.

2. For the vertically challenged amongst us, they are, of course, ideal for cobwebs. This is part of their primary function. The advent of extendible handles make reaching the corners of ceilings far safer… and you don’t have to bend for the skirting boards either, so technically, you can still be writing, or reading, on your phone as you clean… They are also good for retrieving the innumerable pens that disappear down the back of the desk…

3. Speaking of cobwebs… spiders. I don’t like killing them, but prefer not to live with the large and visible ones. My son bought a humane spider catcher… a gadget designed to trap and eject the creatures without damage, but which, without fail when duly applied, squashes them every time or at best deprives them of several legs. While the spiders can survive without a number of legs and may, in fact, grow them back, I cannot help but feel this leglessness to be an unnecessary inconvenience. The feather duster picks them up gently and cradles them to the door. With the added bonus of terrorising any sons in the vicinity on the way past. This works every time, in theory. And if you are lucky. If not…

4. Spiders move fast… so do feather dusters, and with the aforementioned extendible handle, you don’t have to get too close to the scurrying beast attempting to convince you it is a tarantula. At worst, if you cannot actually encourage the little blighters onto the feathers, and you can dodge any arachnophobic sons trying to get off the floor whilst maintaining a pose of nonchalant unconcern, you can use them as a kind of sweeping brush to get them out of the door without damage. Even if, by this time, the dog is showing an inordinate amount of interest in the proceedings…

5. …at which point the duster becomes an effective distraction from the spider itself. The small creature thus has a chance at survival… even if it means creeping back in as soon as your back is turned. Meanwhile the dog has discovered a new toy. She discovers it anew every time and chases, pounces, stalks and dances round in circles until she is exhausted and crawls under the sofa cushions to sleep…

And a quick tip… if your ‘feather’ duster is synthetic, dusting a screen makes it pick up static that even sucks the crumbs out of keyboards… They are a writers’ best friend. So… if you haven’t got one… what are you waiting for?

Ani video 005

About Sue Vincent

Sue Vincent is a Yorkshire-born writer and one of the Directors of The Silent Eye, a modern Mystery School. She writes alone and with Stuart France, exploring ancient myths, the mysterious landscape of Albion and the inner journey of the soul. Find out more at France and Vincent. She is owned by a small dog who also blogs. Follow her at scvincent.com and on Twitter @SCVincent. Find her books on Goodreads and follow her on Amazon worldwide to find out about new releases and offers. Email: findme@scvincent.com.
This entry was posted in Dogs, Humour, writing and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

60 Responses to 5 observations on the necessity of owning a feather duster…

  1. tiramit says:

    Wow! the static contained in a synthetic feather duster picks up tiny things, what a brilliant observation…

    Like

  2. Ritu says:

    Lol! Love this I have a synthetic extendible handle one!

    Like

  3. Ali Isaac says:

    Ugh! Dont mention the ‘s’ word. The first demon of the season has crawled into my house and is lurking somewhere in my bedroom. I’m just waiting for it to pop out and terrify me, which they seem to enjoy as their amusement. I’m not sleeping very well… 😁

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  4. I love this post and I love my synthetic feather duster! I am jealous however as I do not have the extendible-handled variety. will be on the lookout for that as I am also vertically challenged as well as a wimp well it comes to spiders or in fact, any ‘creatures’!

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  5. jenanita01 says:

    very useful things, feather dusters…

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  6. Mary Smith says:

    Ooh, I’m going to get one for the crumbs in the keyboard.

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  7. Funny post, Sue, dusting is my nemesis, the worst task out there. No matter the implement, you dust, some of it goes airborne, and comes right back on the surface. So frustrating. ☺ Thanks for bringing some levity.

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  8. Don’t need one because ZuZu sucks up all the bugs around here. Yummmy!

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  9. I love reading funny blogs and that was brilliant. Thanks! 🙂

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  10. We use an old plastic yogurt container and the random flyer from the mail to scoop the spiders and insects that make their way into the house, back out again. Generally works quite well. The dusting is another matter…

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  11. noelleg44 says:

    We use a Swiffer duster – I had a feather one, but it just stirred up the dust to settle again in the same place. The Swiffer actually picks up the dust. I’m sure it would have the same attraction for the tennis ball loving pooch.

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  12. I must get one – I’m plagued with spiders and their webwork!

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  13. They’re also good for the waistline – reach up to run around the room wafting betwixt wall and ceiling , then do a reverse circuit covering the skirting boards. Also, they give wonderful sense of satisfaction in that you have dusted – even if most of the dust is actually blowing about waiting to settle again. The secret then is to run quickly out of the room and close the door – then you don’t see it. J x

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  14. Reblogged this on Barrow Blogs: and commented:
    Thoughts on a feather duster

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Now how do you get crumbs on your keyboard?…anyway I thought the spiders would have ate them!
    Great fun post, thanks for the giggles Judith x

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  16. Sue, I didn’t realize how much I was missing out on! On the way to the store as I type! No wait, I mean I’ll go to the store as soon as I get off the computer! 😉

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  17. I rescued one that a relative tossed out years ago – it’s been so useful ever since and has carried a few spiders to freedom just like yours! Although luckily the dogs don’t seem interested like your cute little Ani 🙂

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  18. Ain and the feather duster. Could be the title of her next book! 😂😂

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  19. Helen Jones says:

    Yes, I have one too- great for cobwebs though I draw the line at spiders. Under a glass with a card and then out the window, fast! Had a couple of big ones already this season – though they are a little more timid than their Aussie counterparts, I still don’t like to share a room with them 🙂

    Like

  20. macjam47 says:

    LOL. I have 3 or 4. Couldn’t be without them.

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  21. Eliza Waters says:

    So funny – thanks for the smiles. Like Noelle, I have a Swiffer…do they have them in the UK? A typically American disposable item, it is a electrostaticly-charged, polyester puff on a wand, so dust clings to it. When it’s ‘full’ of dust one slips it off and puts a new one on. But just because I have one, doesn’t mean I use it much. I’d rather go for a walk or spend hours at the computer or reading. 😉

    Like

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